money can’t buy happiness but it can buy a false sense of security and fruity alcoholic beverages to numb the pain and honestly what’s the difference

(via this-is-how-you-go-on)


Putting on your bra when your skin is wet is like wrestling with satan

(via iambeyonceries)


why do good concert tickets happen to bad people

(via iambeyonceries)


if they dont play ‘year 3000’ at least once on the new year’s of 3000 i will literally rise out of my grave and set everyone on fire

You can’t do that because we’ll live underwater

(via phisigtrue)